Some days are great and that’s just awesome….. Some days however are just plain crappy….
That’s the reality of this thing called LIFE…..
Far too often we see people’s life in pictures and quotes on social media channels such as Facebook, Twitter, Linked In, Snapchat showing the world how wonderful everything is in their world…..and of course showing us only what they truly want others to see. (The superficial mask lol)
And then we can find ourselves starting to compare our lives and ourselves to them and feeling like ‘what’s wrong with me”…..
HELLO ….Reality check !!!!
Life is NOT always a bed of roses….it simply cannot be as there are always ups and downs, unless you live in an isolated room with no contact at all with the world….
Life has multiple facets, whether it’s about you yourself, you as part of a family, you as a friend, a worker, a partner, a parent or whatever other multiple roles you play…..you are as multi-faceted as life….
And part of coping with things and getting through the more challenging times is becoming aware of what is really going on for you and acknowledging that and allowing yourself to be vulnerable enough to feel those feelings and emotions, to face up to them, no matter how painful they are and accepting that they are part of your reality for now.
It certainly doesn’t mean that you need to develop a permanent sense of helplessness and accept that that’s just how life is, and you cannot change it…..
It’s important to check in with yourself after a day (a week or even a year) that hasn’t gone to plan ….
It’s important to pick yourself up, dust yourself off….and acknowledge that your feelings are very real and extremely important…..
Let yourself feel, even though that can certainly be extremely painful at times …it’s vital that you don’t block those feelings out….
What the heck, wallow for a little if you really need to…..have your ‘pity party’ and allow yourself to truly experience the reality of those emotions….
Don’t judge yourself, you are human…. just allow yourself to see the feelings for what they are and embrace that moment of feeling completely vulnerable, knowing you don’t have total control of everything in your life, and of yourself at all times…..embrace your vulnerability and sit with those feelings……
Accept, Reflect and Focus
Accept them for what they are….emotions…..and accept that they do not control you, they are part of your experience right there and then…..and you can choose to let them go when you are ready….
Reflect on the Hardships, loss, pain and grief, horrible and traumatic things that are part of your life and look at the lessons you can learn from them and the experiences you have gained as a result of these life lessons….
And then Focus on the times in your life where there have been Achievements, accomplishments, celebrations and positive things going on for you….you will notice that life really does have ups and downs and you can choose what you focus on at any time.
And sometimes these hardships continue for far longer than we’d like them to, and it is very easy to become disillusioned and to feel like it would be easier to simply quit, or run away or find a way out….
However, as part of this experience of life, we generally know that life has ups as well as downs and whilst we may be feeling as though something is currently insurmountable….at times when we least expect improvement something does change….just a little…..
We can then look towards the little things, the small blessings in life that we can be grateful for….for the peace and serenity we might be seeking really is there always…..at times we have to work harder to uncover it….
Look back on what has gone well in your life, at a time when things were ok….at a time when you felt like quitting but instead you chose to move forward….just one foot in front of the other, not always knowing where it would lead you …. And not knowing whether you would make it….
Think about what plans you had set for yourself, what you had been focused on, what you were looking to achieve….
Then Think about WHY you were heading towards those goals you set for yourself in the first place…think about your reason for doing what it is that you do….
And after that reality check….see if you still feel like quitting….
If you can reconnect with your true reason for doing what you do, for being who it is that you are…..
Then you should have all the answers you need….
You will know if you can keep heading towards those goals you set, or if they are no longer realistic and need to be adjusted….and be kind to yourself, be realistic and get clear on what it is that drives you when you are feeling OK and not as vulnerable.
Then dust yourself off and refocus and take one tiny step every single day….
One small step towards where you want to go will still get you moving forward…..
Go on….back yourself….you’re worth it xx